Author Archives: Bonita

About Bonita

I'm a forgetful person. But I think a lot. Every day, a lot of thoughts enter my head. That's why this blog came to be: first, to keep my memories alive through the years, and two, to actually see how I and my thoughts have changed. Please note that I seldom draft or edit my posts. Sometimes, if I'm not careful, I offend some of you, my readers. And while I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable, I am not sorry for being honest or for making well-intentioned mistakes. I will however be the first to admit if I change my mind. Hence, do read and proceed with caution. My life is as colorful and as boring as you make it. I complain many days, but offer some encouragement in others. Life is fluid, it changes. So keep the positives and throw away the negatives, and I do hope that at the end of the day, you will enjoy reading the blog and leaving comments here and there if my posts touches you. Happy reading!

10 Best Books for Babies (0-3 years old)

My one wish for my baby is that she will have the love of reading. That’s why, I’ve hoarded many books ever since she was born. We now have a growing library of books for her to read. However, books … Continue reading

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The Problematic Bear

We found this cute backpack bear at the Taipei Taoyuan Airport. My daughter squealed with delight and wanted to take it home. I hate finding random things. While other people may think they are lucky to find money on the … Continue reading

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8 Things I dislike about Pregnancy

1. The monthly prenatal check-ups and long waits outside the clinic You have to go and see your OB every month. My OB’s clinic is from 1pm to 4pm. We arrived at 12:30pm and was #10! This is going to … Continue reading

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Two Sports Games: One Uplifted the Nation, the Other Disgraced It

This week, there were two notable sports events that’s being heralded around the world. There’s the exciting World Cup Match between Belgium and Japan last Monday.  Apparently, people originally thought Japan would win, until Belgium made a surprise upset to … Continue reading

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One of the Hardest Things to Do is to Do Nothing

My husband’s business is in a bit of financial constraints due to having too much expenses vs. lowered revenue plus operational inefficiency and some wastage. The easiest thing to do is to loan his business money. If you have the … Continue reading

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When someone doubts your integrity

One of my staff got paid her back pay today. The amount was about php39,000, about 3x the minimum wage. Her backpay consisted of one month of wages. She had been with us for 3 years before resigning to get … Continue reading

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I am Pregnant… Again!

I am pregnant again! A lot of thoughts went into my head: I am still breastfeeding. How will my daughter nursing impact my baby especially since she’s very malikot. Will it be a boy or a girl? A girl is … Continue reading

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What do you do if you hate your daughter’s boyfriend?

This question was posed to us earlier today, “What do you do if you hate your daughter’s boyfriend?” My Chinese sister-in-law and her Australian husband shared that their strategy was to be open to their child so as to remove … Continue reading

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Hiring in the Philippines

Girl A I hired two weeks before texted me the day before she was supposed to start to say she will no longer accept the offer she accepted two days before. Girl B I hired last week came only for … Continue reading

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10 Factors I Look Into When Weeding Out Job Applicants in the Philippines

One of our office staff resigned two weeks ago. She’s 22 years old and have been with us for almost two years. Reason for resigning: She wants to try out her luck working overseas in Abu Dhabi as a cashier, … Continue reading

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Marriage Tip: Love Your In-Laws

A lot of people complain about their mother-in-laws (MIL). One mommy complained to her husband when her mother-in-law brought out her 3-month old baby out without asking for her permission. “It was raining!” she said in exasperation. “Do I have … Continue reading

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Life Tip: Get a smaller house

When I was 22, I lived on my own in Taipei. I rented out a small studio unit close the the University that had its own bathroom for NTD 10,000. It was a few streets away from school. I shared … Continue reading

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When a Deal Falls Apart

Last Monday, I signed a one-year lease contract for a small unit my husband owns. I have been showing the unit off a few times, and finally, I was able to lease it out with cash upfront. Of course, I … Continue reading

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Three Bad Lucks

This week, we experienced three unfortunate events: At the beginning of the week, two of our staff went AWOL (Absence without Leave). Both were earning a good sum of money. However, one demanded she be transferred to a store of … Continue reading

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What’s the Difference Between a Aspiring Entrepreneur and the Boring Employee?

A lot of people want to be in business to get rich. They feel that to be an employee, you’d be stuck working for someone else for peanuts for the rest of their lives. I actually disagree. For one, many … Continue reading

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Why You Have to Love Yourself

There’s a saying that before everyone else can love you, you have to love yourself FIRST. That’s the problem with sayings, you never fully understand them when you hear them at first. It’s like someone telling you some feel good … Continue reading

Posted in Advice, Boyfriend, Conflicts, Favorite Posts, Filipino Men/Women, First Days of Marriage, First Experiences, Husband, Life lessons, lovelife, Marriage, Men, Reflections, Relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Leadership Lesson: Your Business Loses Money if You Don’t Double Check

My husband loves cars. He loves his people. And he loves talking to his customers. However, he HATES looking at bank statements, ledgers and statement of accounts. Whenever he gets one, he gives it one look and tosses it away … Continue reading

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Why I got into Business

A high school student came the other day and asked me about my experience as a businesswoman. His comments made me reflect on the decisions that I’ve made and why I actually got into business. My parents were both businessman. … Continue reading

Posted in Business, Dad's Advice, entrepreneurship, Family Drama, Hong Kong Life, Husband, leadership, Marriage, Personal opinion, Philippines, Reflections, Work | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Danger of Discontentment

Our best sales staff decided to end her employment this April 2018. She was earning around php18,000-22,000 per month, an achievement especially since she was not a college graduate and has no special skills. She is only 26 years old. … Continue reading

Posted in Conflicts, Family Drama, Filipino Men/Women, Life lessons, lovelife, Marriage, MBA / Studies, Personal opinion, Rants, Reflections, Relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Why We Brought our Toddler to the Dentist

This month, our 2 year old daughter cleaned her teeth at our neighboring dentist. This is the third time she’s visited the dentist for cleaning. Luckily, she was docile and kept still for most of the cleaning. “Why would you … Continue reading

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Why we didn’t bring Little Pea this trip

We have been on a tiring business trip this entire week. These 4.5 days is one of the longest vacations we have had without our baby. Husband and I cannot help but miss her a little and review some of … Continue reading

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Questions to ask during yaya interview

I got a new yaya 2 days after the old yaya left. I caught old yaya on Saturday, asked her to leave on Sunday, and interviewed and hired a new yaya on Tuesday. April 9 was a holiday so maybe … Continue reading

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Bye Bye Yaya!

I decided to let go of yaya yesterday after catching her with her MMDA boyfriend last April 7. On April 7, yaya asked for permission to go downstairs to buy snacks from MiniStop. This is not unusual for her so … Continue reading

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Leadership Lesson: Be Kind

When I was in Hong Kong, I learned how to be a bigger b*tch. Everything was fast paced and everyone was on top of their games. I worked with the best of the best, and loved it. I worked from … Continue reading

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Leadership Lesson: Assign Responsibility to the Person to Increase Accountability

We love a hurrah story — A story when a group comes together in lieu of a single goal, working together cooperatively and achieving success. A hurrah story is big picture. It makes a great story, but when you inspect … Continue reading

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Apparently, I’m a boss b*tch

One of the hardest things about being a boss is making unpopular decisions. I had one such experience last month. One of my contractual sales staff had a personal emergency. The night before, she fought with a live-in partner and … Continue reading

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6 Reasons Why You’re Still Single at 40

Yesterday, I asked the question, “Why would a beautiful 40-year old woman still be SINGLE?” I’ve wondered this question and asked several friends what they thought. We mulled over whether it was the guys’ fault or the girl’s fault that … Continue reading

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Why would a beautiful 40 year old woman still be SINGLE?

My girl best friend bemoans the fact that she is almost 40 and still single. “My last single best friend is getting married,” she moaned. “And I’m still single and barren.” My best friend should not be single. She is very … Continue reading

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Upbringing Makes a Difference

I talked about the Big Bad Wolf Booksale the other day. We were all having a ball scouring through rows and rows of books. My 2 year old daughter kept on putting books to the pushcart while my poor mother … Continue reading

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This is the funniest story I read last week

The story of the couple who sells all their belongings, buys a boat to travel the world and somehow sinks it two days later. Since their boat is below water, they are trying crowdfunding in the hopes of raising $12,800 … Continue reading

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The Biggest Book Fair in Manila is HERE!

The Big Bad Wolf Book Fair is now ongoing at World Trade Center from February 16 to 25, 2018. The fair is 24 hours and last continuously everyday until midnight of February 25. Entrance is FREE and the venue is … Continue reading

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Question: Should I marry someone even though I feel there might be somebody better out there for me?

I dated a guy who was great on paper for 2.5 years. He was smart, had a great job, was very responsible, and said he will love and take care of me for the rest of his life.He was also … Continue reading

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Matigas ang Ulo (Hard Headed)

I have extensive experience of multiple staff who are especially hard headed. These are the people who intentionally try to circumvent the rules when they can, and pout when they cannot. True Story # 1:  My brother went on a … Continue reading

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Relationship Advice: Stop making your wife do all the work!

In marriage, it’s easy to push responsibilities to your partner. “It’s the job of the mother to take care of the kids.” “It’s the job of the wife to cook for the husband.” “It’s not my job to keep the … Continue reading

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The Tale of Two Pregnancies

I talked about our driver who was na-kupit by the girlfriend. Despite having relationship problems with his needy and controlling girlfriend, our driver managed to get her pregnant, of which I believe is NOT an accident. *The things women do … Continue reading

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When Debt is a Ticking Timebomb

My father-in-law warned me from being jealous of the very rich men in the country. He said, “Don’t ever think they are rich just because they say they are rich. You never know, they are even poorer than we are.” … Continue reading

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“Nakupit”

I asked my husband the English translation of the Filipino word, “Kupit.” “There’s actually no accurate English translation,” he said. “But it’s like getting pregnant out of wedlock.” That’s actually not a good translation. For me, nakupit means to be caught in a … Continue reading

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Yes, it’s better to be an Employee than an Employer

Ever since I was young, my father has always instilled to me the wonders of being an entrepreneur. “You need to manage your own business, Bonita,” he said. “No matter how high up the corporate ladder you get, if you are … Continue reading

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How can you tell if someone’s lying?

The wonders of a lie is that it’s usually not perfectly thought of… That means, when a question was asked, the lie was blurted without much thought whatsoever. What’s more, if other fellow liars are involved, there is not a … Continue reading

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How My Friend Got Away with Infidelity

My married friend learned that her husband was flirting with other women behind her back. Given that he needs to be based in the Southern area and their child studies here in Manila, they have spent many days apart per … Continue reading

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Why we still don’t have our second kid?

Let me approach the elephant in the room — Bakit walang kasunod ang anak ko?  In English, it means, “How come we have yet to have our second child?” Our daughter is already 2 years old. We just recently celebrated … Continue reading

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If you don’t watch your staff, don’t be surprised if they go and party!

My father-in-law tells me about a janitor who works in his Association’s building. Since he was the Association President that year, he was the one who interviewed and oriented that personnel before hiring him. “The janitor was good. He has initiative,” he … Continue reading

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You Know it’s Christmas in the Philippines if….

The malls are full, even at 11:00pm There is laughter in the air, and traffic everywhere…. Christmas cantatas in the park, simbang gabi after dark….. Gastos sa gifts, no need for balik….. Gastos din sa employees, 13th month pay, bonus … Continue reading

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“Hindi Pwedeng Hindi” (Never say Never)

When I worked at a prestigious investment bank, I asked my assistant to DHL a very important time-critical document to one of our largest clients. It was her visa, which will allow her to fly to Taiwan that Sunday for … Continue reading

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My Daughter is Raised by a Community

I have never prided myself as a Supermom. The first time I bathed my baby was when she was 13 months old. That was also the time I cleaned up my baby’s poo. My husband was absurdly hurt, and I … Continue reading

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Why I celebrate my daughter’s 2 year old birthday even though she’s too young to remember

My husband thinks I’m crazy. “Why do you even need to celebrate her birthday party? She’s only two,” he said. “She is way too young to remember.” He sees me buying stuff for her lootbag. I am very happy with … Continue reading

Posted in baby, Early Learning, Education, Family, Kid Problems, Parenthood, Parenting, Updates | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Don’t Be Boastful When Mad

My husband screamed at me today. Two days ago, he asked me to help him to transfer money overseas. My supplier gives me better rates than his, so he asked for my assistance, which I timely gave. Today, his supplier … Continue reading

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Lessons from Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein is a powerful Hollywood producer. He is also a man who raped and sexually harassed many women. Weinstein used his position to place women in compromising positions and sexually abuse them. Here are just the impartial list of women … Continue reading

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Na-Basted! 

My friend J, who I have talked about in this post, “When a man chase after a woman and he’s not that cute,” has been busted by his potential lady love. Long story short, the woman said she only wanted … Continue reading

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When a man chases after a woman… but he’s not THAT cute

A man in serious like/love, who is ardently pursuing a woman, is a man on fire. My friend, who is pursuing my female best friend, is such a man. Since she lives in another country, when she came to visit, … Continue reading

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Bottlefeeding at almost 23 months

My baby is exclusively breastfed ever since she was born. Despite me overstocking various brands of milk bottles, daughter refused to drink from the bottle. I had to sell all our surplus bottles just because she refused to drink if … Continue reading

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When husband calls

My husband calls me.  He says he is hungry. I look at my desk. Actually there’s still a lot to do.  I find it a little bit unfair has the free time to roam around the mall while I manage the … Continue reading

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My Yaya’s Key Performance Indicators

My baby has a yaya (nanny) who’s already been with us for a year. Now, I’ve never really been too sensitive regarding dust or dirt, which is why I’m not too upset when she doesn’t really clean our living room. … Continue reading

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When Your Baby is a Picky Eater

Karma really is a b*tch… Last year, people were asking for advice on what to do when their baby is a picky eater. My baby, who was super fat at that time, did NOT have this problem. Just by exclusively … Continue reading

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Will you compromise just a little bit if you’re not a spring chicken no more?

When I was dating my now-husband at 32 years old, my future father-in-law chided me, “But you’re not a spring chicken anymore!” I wasn’t insulted as much as I was amused. In the end, I had the last laugh. I … Continue reading

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Top 10 Tips in Traveling to Siem Reap/Angkor Wat

We were at Siem Reap last weekend for my birthday. Here are some takeaways from our trip: 1. The flight and temple tickets were expensive. The rest were not. We booked a direct flight from Manila to Siem Reap via … Continue reading

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Language Miscommunication

I asked why the stir fried beef noodles my family took home last night had no beef.  We were in Siem Reap for a family vacation. I stayed at home to be with my sleeping toddler. They laughed. “Your husband … Continue reading

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What did I learn from Touring the Slums (Part 2)?

Continuation…. 7. It’s tough to be educated in Baseco. There are two schools closely located in Baseco. The average teacher to student ratio is 1:75. When I was a child, the average is 1:45. The big problem is not the … Continue reading

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Slum Living in Baseco Manila

We joined the Smokey Tours yesterday and visited the Baseco Slums in Tondo, Manila. The tours itself only cost Php 950.00 per person and includes a local tour guide and the transportation to/fro Carriedo and Baseco. Details and inclusions of … Continue reading

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What to do when you encounter a crazy man who’s out to get you?

We went to a children’s party today.  During one of the games, my husband who was babysitting (yaya was in day-off) sat our 2-year old toddler in one of the seats previously occupied by another kid when she stood up.  … Continue reading

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A Shocking Discovery

I was browsing through my husband’s phone yesterday since my phone battery already died. Since we were traveling to Angkor Wat with family soon, I was checking out activities I can add to our itinerary. Given our destination, I wanted … Continue reading

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A Father’s Love

My uncle is a single parent with an adult daughter. He was separated from his wife years ago, and has resorted to maintaining a slew of long-term girlfriends. The current girlfriend has been in his life for a decade already. … Continue reading

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Quitting While You’re Ahead

Our store in Robinsons Galleria was the branch that started it all.  It was the first branch we signed the contract on after my in-laws gave us the company to manage. We refurbished a brand new look and feel for … Continue reading

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The Two Week Employee

We hired a Designer two weeks ago.  He was in his 30s, worked for a food packing company, and could seem to do the job. He showed us his impressive portfolio and I liked how his designs seem professionally done … Continue reading

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When your husband buys an expensive tub of ice cream…

My husband wanted to buy a php381 Ben & Jerry’s ice cream tub of Cherry Garcia yesterday at Rustan’s.  Php 381 isn’t cheap. It’s almost the daily minimum wage of a waiter in the Philippines.  I don’t think that an … Continue reading

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How to Fight With Your Husband

If you’re with someone, it’s inevitable that you will one day fight with them. I personally have fought with my husband in our three years of marriage. The biggest was during our first few months of marriage when I had … Continue reading

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Small Biz Chronicles: My Stupid USD 1,200 Mistake

Fortunes are lost because of stupid 5-second mistakes. I lost USD 1,200 (or Php 60,000+) over the weekend because of a stupid one. I ordered a few boxes of goods for shipping to Manila. Usually, the boxes are heavy and … Continue reading

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Question: Should I marry someone even though I feel there might be somebody better out there for me?

I dated a guy who was great on paper for 2.5 years. He was smart, had a great job, was very responsible, and said he will love and take care of me for the rest of his life.He was also … Continue reading

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Whoever said being a boss means bossing people around is LYING

My husband’s friend quit his cushy job to start his own business.  Apparently, many believe that if you want to be a millionaire and be able to order people around, you need to have your own business.  I don’t think … Continue reading

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Inertia stops you from succeeding

Three years ago, when husband and I got married, my in-laws gifted us with a small, fledging retail business. “This will be your bread and butter,” they said. I looked at the numbers and quickly became concerned. Rent was high … Continue reading

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Updates: A Cranky Sunday

The entire household has the cold. Yaya was patient zero. Then came baby girl. Hubby got struck yesterday. And I’ve been experiencing mild sore throat today.  Baby girl can’t go to school due to the cold. When she sneezes, she … Continue reading

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Interview Chronicles: Top 5 Red Flags when Interviewing

I’ve interviewed thousands of people since our business is in retail and we have been expanding.  When I interview, there’s a few red flags I look out for. The biggest bombs come after the question, “Why did you leave your … Continue reading

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To the best band there is… I’m so sorry and I cry with you…

My husband shook me awake last night, “Linkin Park is dead.” “What do you mean it’s dead?” I groggily asked. Mind you, I was already half asleep by then.  He showed me the article, “Chester Bennington is dead due to … Continue reading

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“Your Child is ‘Matigas ng Ulo’ (Hardheaded)”

My daughter’s teacher has been complaining about our 19-month old child. She said that our kid is strong-willed and hard headed. The teacher also said that she has a tendency to hurt herself when she is frustrated. According to the … Continue reading

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Interview Chronicles: This must be one of the most unfortunate women in the world…

…So who really died? 😭😭😭

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I’m happy I had kids late

There’s a lot of young mothers in Manila. Many of them already have one child as teenagers, often due to callous attitudes towards contraceptive and the ignorant belief that that getting pregnant will not happen to them.  http://www.bbc.com/news/av/embed/p053y66t/40060748 I got … Continue reading

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How can you work if you are hungry?

I had a staff member start working for us last week.  According to her, she was living with her aunt in Caloocan, and the aunt was forcing her to find work. “I only have php 5.00 in my pocket,” she … Continue reading

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Review: Bijin Nabe Hotpot in S Maison Mall

We were at Conrad Hotel’s S Maison Mall for dinner last night because of the Toy Convention, and had the opportunity to try two of their restaurants: Bijin Nabe by Tsukada Nojo Hotpot Restaurant and Tsujiri Macha for desert. There … Continue reading

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No means no

My daughter is 18 months old.  And for an 18-month old, she has a good memory.  Just imagine, two months ago, we brought her to Kidzoona Robinsons Galleria.  Today, as we go to Galleria, she holds my hand and tugs … Continue reading

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HR Mode On

Since my HR assistant left, I’ve been doing a lot of interviewing and orientation. My heart breaks whenever I see another single mother who’s been beaten or cheated on by her ex boyfriend, and cannot seem to get her sh*t … Continue reading

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Late Night Discovery

Some good and bad news: Bad news: I’m not yet pregnant. Even though so many people are chasing me for a second kid.  Good news: I just got my period last night! Wohoo!  How can that be good news? Well, … Continue reading

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Lesson of the Day: Engagement

I read an interesting article by Business Insider, “My 11-year-old son auditioned at Juilliard, and we both learned a lot about how top performers practice.” As I read the article, I can’t help but ask, “How engaged are we really … Continue reading

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There’s been a lot of movement in the office…

…so apologies for not updating as often as I should. Just this week for example, I’ve let go of two people. One for extreme negligence, habitual absenteeism and tardiness and complete disregard for work, while the other is because she … Continue reading

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The Lord answers prayers

I have a bit of issues in the office, and given that everything is happening at the same time, it’s been a very stressful time for me.  Two of my staff share the responsibility of monitoring our inventory. One is … Continue reading

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Tag Along Baby

My husband is fixing the zamboni machine at an ice skating rink in an SM mall.  We bring along our daughter with us. We picked her up from home and bring her along with us. At present, she is just … Continue reading

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Don’t borrow money. Just cut back.

For many Filipinos, it is easier to borrow money when times get tough. And to return the money when we already have money.  The problem is, it’s not easy to borrow money. If you have a habit of borrowing money, … Continue reading

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Why do we only have one child? 

I didn’t believe my college friend when he warned me that the second kid was the hardest to make.  When he told me that, I was newly married and not even pregnant. How could sexy time even be a problem? … Continue reading

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Restaurant Review: L’Entrecote at Burgos Circle

Today is Mother’s Day! So in lieu of my second year of motherhood, my husband agreed to take me for a nice lunch at BGC. We ate at L’Entrecote in BGC, a restaurant I’ve been wanting to try months ago. … Continue reading

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The Plight of the Single Mothers

There are many single mothers at the place I work in. A lot of them had their first child as a teenager, and most of them in their 20s. Who are the fathers? Well, half of them did not take responsibility, leaving … Continue reading

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Today is one of those challenging days. 

One of the biggest issue surrounding a worker in Manila is that it’s very difficult for them to keep their professional and personal life separate.  Especially as women, we have accepted our fates as responsible breadwinners, burdened mothers, martyred wives … Continue reading

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Why I love the Philippine mall culture!

Whenever I have foreign guests flying into town, I book them in a half-day cultural tour in Intramuros and ask them to visit our big malls. “Come to SM Megamall!” I’d exclaim as I book them at the BSA Towers. … Continue reading

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Parenting = Being the Bad Guy 

Yesterday, we had to admit my daughter into the hospital. She’s had on and off fever for three days straight, and her white blood cells are a high 38,000 count. The average count for white blood cells for babies her … Continue reading

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Wives: We are the Problem!

I am a part of a popular mommy group. Many of them complain about their husbands. A few complain of their husband’s addiction to video games. “I am exhausted and take care of the baby 24/7, while his nose is … Continue reading

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Money Can’t Buy Class

The Met Gala is one of the biggest fashion events of the year. Celebrities and attendees have a chance to WOW everyone with their interpretation of a theme — this year it was Rei Kawakubo/Comme des Garçons — and show off their … Continue reading

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What are the steps for a successful startup?

It’s all about execution. No matter how great your ideas are, if you do not execute your idea, you won’t become successful. Case in point, we have a small accessory retail business. Currently we have 20 stores in major malls … Continue reading

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My Husband’s Walking the Baby

It’s 2:30am and my husband is walking our 16-month old baby. Baby slept a tad bit early and woke up at 1:30am, fresh from her “nap” and pushing for some action. So husband took the bullet and is around the … Continue reading

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Do What You Love and You’ll Never Work a Day in Your Life

It’s a popular adage that you need to do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life. And if you cannot find what you love, don’t settle. Keep on looking for it until you find it. To … Continue reading

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When your husband annoys you during a Coldplay concert

Years before, I told myself that if Coldplay was holding a concert in the same country, I would definitely watch it. Apparently, they’re one of the few bands that put on a great show and authentically sing in their concerts. So … Continue reading

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Does your staff have Tom-K?

  My father-in-law has a rule that he will hire AND keep people who has TOM-K. After 25 years in the business, I think he knows what he’s talking about. Now, what does Tom-K mean? T – Tapat (Integrity) O … Continue reading

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Planning a Wedding? Here’s a Super Helpful Must Have List for You!

I just thought of starting a wedding planning series to commemorate my brother’s wedding. So lucky for all the readers who are planning a wedding soon! If you are a woman, congratulations for getting the man of your dreams to propose! … Continue reading

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