There are times when we’re stuck, with no solutions in sight.
Today is one of those times.
The ultimatum just arrived: Trader’s parents hate me, and they want Trader to break up with me.
He is of course, sad about all these. Through these years, he’s always been a very good boy and an amazing son. Despite his geographical distance from them, he’s managed to stay in close touch with them via regular emails and phone calls.
However, it was just unfortunate that they didn’t like me.
Why you ask?
I didn’t fit the typical Filipino-Chinese mould of a good lady/girlfriend/wife.
Trader placed it very succinctly today on why he’s really not that attracted to Filipino-Chinese born/bred women.
1) They just don’t have the oomph in fashion.
I’d have to agree with him on this. Whereas my fashion consists of skirts, pants, slacks, shorts and dresses, Fil-Chi women only have one type of attire: “Mango tops and jeans.”
In other words, it’s usually just a normal t-shirt and jeans type of attire.
Yes, that’s what we still dress in as adults.
2) Fil-Chis cannot really debate about finance.
Put it this way, a normal graduate from the Philippines would usually venture out towards marketing or brand management. Philippines was not really the type of country which holds finance in the highest regard. In fact, they’ve only passed the REIT laws recently.
However, given circumstances, Trader and I just have that thing in common. We both worked and have an avid interest in finance and we can talk about a deal for hours.
In a way, though we are different from each other, we do have certain similarities as well. And fortunately, it’s something that we’re both passionate about.
3) A lot of Filipino-Chinese kids spend a lot of time with their parents.
In my family for example, the children are expected to be with their parents most of the time. For example, while I was parent sitting, I was pretty much spending time with them 24/7.
However, it would be terrific as well if the children also developed their own interests outside their families.
To illustrate, before I moved to Taiwan, I thought my favorite dish was beef noodles since we ate it everyday.
It was only a year after I arrived that I realized that I wasn’t too much into beef noodles.
Because despite Taiwan’s beef noodles as being the best and the tastiest, I have never even eaten a bite of beef noodles that whole year!
It was after that epiphany that I realized that it wasn’t me who liked beef noodles, but my family. But since we were eating it all the time, I thought it was actually me who liked it!
I think in the end, it’s our life we’re talking about. Parents will always have something to say about the partners their kids have chosen. However, it’s YOU who would have to live with your choice. Not them.
It’s sad though.
Trader and I love each other, and they’ve only met me once.
However, one simple accidental mistake prior to the meeting has changed the entire dynamics. Though I am an optimistic person, I don’t know if we can ever persuade his parents to not hate me.
But we shall see.
The relationship is working and growing stronger. There is no cause for us to worry about it today.
It’s just my, and our hope that in the end, this will all pass, and we are still together.
Hope all is well. Just moved into the dorm and it’s quite comfy.
Have a great week everyone!