Happy Birthday to a 29 year-old me!

Last year, my parents told me that I can now officially date. Now turning 29, I’m dating this really nice guy, relocated to a new country and are celebrating by parent-sitting this week.

My dad is constantly in my back about Trader. “Can he support you? Maybe I’ll need to support him?” He takes great pleasure in putting people down that I’m surprised that my mom is still with him. Of course, it hurts me that he judges Trader before he even meets him, but that’s my dad. You can’t really change your dad even if you wanted to.

In the midst of my blooming love life despite my father’s unpleasant reaction, I stand at a crossroad. At the age of 29, I still am not in the road of getting an MBA and time is running out. Fast.

Why do you need an MBA for anyway?” my little brother chided. “It won’t be any good especially if you find yourself married in one two years.” My mom thinks that if I am really serious about an MBA, I should just do it this round or lose the chance. “If you don’t do it now, you may blame Trader in the long run for stopping you in getting your MBA when issues arise.”

Trader is supportive, but not really. He has made it clear that an MBA is useless and he’d rather have me beside him helping us build our empire instead of studying for an MBA. “Practical knowledge and the opportunity cost of being away from the markets are not worth the MBA. Why do you need it anyway especially if we’re going to do our business together?”

Old-time readers know that ’ve always wanted an MBA but for some reason, was merely delayed. First with my work in Taiwan, then relocating in Hong Kong and so on. However, after settling in Hong Kong and hearing so much noise around, I find myself getting slightly confused on what to do in 2010.

On one hand, I love my job and where I am. Trader firmly believes that nothing good comes in being even more long distanced than we are today especially if I relocate somewhere far away in Europe and the US. If ever he is fine with an MBA, then it should be in Singapore, Hong Kong or China. “It’s already difficult to maintain our long distance. Why even increase the miles in leaps and bounds?”

My parents are telling me to keep options open. “Until you’re married, everything is fair game. Keep your eyes open, and who knows, you may find someone better?” My parents implore me to have Trader prove to them his worth and that he can take good care of me. I personally don’t think it’s necessary as of course, I wouldn’t date the man if he couldn’t.

Anyway, your dear blogger who had been so busy for quite a while and hasn’t been updating is now celebrating her 29th birthday. As part of my blog’s tradition, I’ll ask myself the same questions I’ve asked exactly a year ago and see how different things had become. Was 2008/2009 better than the last? Sure, shit truly hit the fan but in terms of me, how did it go? Mostly the year comes in me starting to settle down with the prospect of being with a stable man who makes me happy, being in a hectic city where you can’t trust anybody and once again, slowly spreading my wings in self-discovery.

In theory, 28 should have been the most exciting year. I’ve always said that 28 was the peak of every woman’s life and I believe it. “28 is the year where you’re no longer a girl, and now becoming a woman,” I’ve said.

And yet, despite the excitingness of it, my life slowed down a lot. I grew a lot more settled in me, with my way of thinking and my boyfriend. The baby, is now a lady.

So 26 was a roller coaster ride. 27 was like riding a stable boat in a pristine lake surrounded by wonderful mountain ranges. 28 was firming up what was already being decided at 27.

Thanks for not giving up on me and this blog when things got really busy!

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1) What have you done when you were 28 that you’ve never done before?

– Dated someone really really nice, and treats me as a guy should. It was such an eye-opener when I broke up with the Caucasian man after he merely disappeared for two weeks without contact. It took decisive effort to choose the man who can make me happy but I did so that’s terrific.

– Move to Hong Kong at the height of the recession and for once, truly feared for my job especially after my line manager got sacked. Christmas and New Year’s were really lonely but it was nice that my company housed me in an uber expensive service apartment!

– Went to Turkey with a 100% speaking Cantonese tour. Found it hilarious when they couldn’t eat the food and instead ate their instant noodle instead.

2) Did anyone close to you give birth?

– Lots of my friends from the Philippines got married recently and had been popping babies. My gosh, I can’t believe that most of these babies from grade school are now actually moms! One of them even bore triplets!

3) Did anyone close to you die?

– Thankfully no… lots of stars passed away though — Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, that Boyzone dude, Anna Nicole Smith, that Kill Bill dude, TONS!

4) What countries did you visit?

– Had been commuting weekends to Singapore via the reasonably priced Jetstar. Been there quite a few times, it’s crazy!

– Turkey – really really nice! I think I gained a few pounds.

– Thailand for a weekend get-away trip

– Taiwan for a business trip. Ironic because I used to live there for 7 years!

5) What would you like to have when you’re 29 that you lacked when you were 28?

– Decisiveness once and for all on the MBA thing. The maturity to juggle everyone’s demands and succeed in my work.

6) What date this year will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

– May 16, when Trader flew to Hong Kong and asked me to be his girlfriend.

7) What was your biggest achievement of the year?

– Being moved to Hong Kong because the higher ups saw my potential. It was a miserable first two months but we got by. Afterwards, I take great pride in being good at what I do and sharing best practices to my colleague around the region!

8 ) What was your biggest failure?

– That I couldn’t be myself and grandstand at work because my colleagues pride “team work” which in direct terms meaning keeping your head down and not stealing the limelight so that you’re non-threatening ad you’re not a victim of being stabbed in the back. I felt that I should’ve stood up for myself more.

9) Did you suffer illness or injury?

– TONS! Upon coming to Hong Kong, I’ve been struck by flu multiple times, got sick, had serious allergies and just felt stressed and depressed (though I feel way better now).

10) What was the best thing you bought?

– Hahaha, would it be surprising but my first branded bag? I got my Bally bag for 40% off during Hong Kong’s big sale!

11) Whose behavior merited celebration?

– Trader – for tolerating me and my wild ideas that drive him completely nuts, and still being right here by my side (I fear that he would run any day now).

12) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

– My Mainlander Chinese female colleague who is just terrific in politcking. Really scary, she’s the type of girl who’ll stop at nothing to cement her position in the company hierarchy. I’ve learned just to stay out of her face and ignore, ignore, ignore.

– My dad who can be so stubborn and selfish sometimes. I don’t know how my mom bears it.

– The recent financial crisis, but then again, who’s not affected? We didn’t get that much bonus.

13) Where did most of your money go?

– Hong Kong’s super expensive. My rent here is 4x that of Taiwan. Also, I’ve been gorging on delicious uber-fattening food which can be so expensive!

– Also did a fair bit of traveling. My weekend commute to see Trader isn’t cheap at HKD2,000 a pop.

14) What did you get really, really, really excited about?

– The future, and learning.

15) What song will always remind you of this year?

– Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face,” Flo Rider’s “Right Round,” Taylor Swift’s “Love Story,” Beyonce’s “Halo,” Black Eyed Peas’ “Boom Boom Pow” and Jeremiah’s “Birthday Sex.”

16) Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Same as last year. Not happier or sadder but just more settled.

ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter. I’ve been eating well and not exercising. Go figure.

iii. richer or poorer? Richer.

17) What do you wish you’d done more of?

– Read more annual reports and studied valuation earlier. I’m just starting after staying 8 months+ in Hong Kong and that’s far too long to be honest.

– Also would’ve been nice if I took my Cantonese classes more seriously.

– Traveled more! You can never get enough traveling. 🙂

18) What do you wish you’d done less of?

– Dilly dallied around. Spent so much money on food although there are no regrets. I just love having high afternoon tea at Sevva, Four Seasons, Mandarin and the Peninsula.

19) How will you be spending Christmas?

– Spending time with the family.  I’m going back to the Philippines from the 24th to the 27th to spend it with loved ones. Last year, I was lonely and was stuck in the office working. It took a kind-hearted colleague who offered to bring me out for dinner with his friends that I was offered a reprive.

20) Did you fall in love between October 2007 to October 2008?

– Yes! 😀

21) How many one-night stands?

– Say good bye to one-night stands even though I’ve never really had them.

22) What was your favorite TV program?

– I liked Ashton Kutcher’s The Beautiful Life which was cancelled unfortunately. Trader loves How I Met Your Mother and got me addicted. I also liked Gossip Girl. Just loved Selina though I can’t imagine why she would constantly be single despite being so fashionable and sexy!

23) Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

– Yes, my colleague. She’s a Mainlander and can be quite manipulative. She’s very nice to your face, telling you how great you are and how much she respects you, but behind you, she grandstands and take every body elses’ credit.

24) What was the best book you read?

– Warren Buffet’s official autobiography, Snowball. Quite an engaging read and teaches you not only of his personal values but also of his financial strategies. I’d strongly recommend this to anyone!

25) What was your greatest musical discovery?

– David Sides, his piano skills are terrific. I also liked Boyce Avenue. Hahah, what you can discover when you’re you tubing! I was also cheering for Adam Lambert from American Idol. I think that his rendition of “Mad World” was super haunting!

26) What did you want and got?

– A change. From being stuck in Taiwan, I finally moved to Hong Kong after almost seven years in the country. I was getting bored and Hong Kong shocked me out of complacency. I HATED Hong Kong during the first three months especially after it was in the middle of a recession! My colleagues were terrible and there were so many politicking in the office.

However, I managed to regain my footing. My apartment is super duper nice and my boyfriend is the same as well. I finally have someone who loves me for me, and loves me a lot to be able to tolerate my many idiocyncracies.

27) What was your favorite film of this year?

– “500 Days of Summer” was so realistic and heartwarming. GI Joe and Harry Potter were well made though Trader having a crush with the Baroness did nothing to improve my mood.  

In the end though, Inglorious Basterds and Star Trek took my breath away. For Inglorious Basterds, though the antagonist looked so much like my ex-boyfriend, the storyline kept us riveted from the first scenes and it was amazing till the very end! Star Trek meanwhile was such fun!

28) How did you celebrate your birthday?

– My parents are in Hong Kong so I’ve spent it parent sitting. My dad was in a bad mood so it was a sucky day. They took home some Ajisen ramen for me to eat, while I bought mini cakes from Maxims.

No worries, we’ll have Part II of my birthday celebration next weekend. Trader will be here too so it’ll be so much better!

29) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

– If I had taken and gotten a high score on my GMAT (no change to last year).

30) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

– A lot more subtle clothings. More turtlenecks with understated skirts and slacks with high heels. Scarves instead of cardigans. On the weeknds, I’ll wear tanktops and shorts along with comfortable white flipflops or my light purple Crocs.

31) What kept you sane?

– My boyfriend, although sometimes, he’s also the source of my insanity. My gayish guy best friend and my intellectual Indian/British friend also kept me grounded.

35) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

– Obama — how the hell is he going to get that health care bill approved, and why on earth was he chosen as the Nobel Peace Prize winner?

36) What political issue stirred you the most?

– The recession – the bust after Lehman broke down and the fall of the banking system. I was interested on how the Fed bailed most of the banks out and how Obama’s trying unsuccessfully police them as they dole out humongous wads of cash/stocks to their executives and employees. I also found the Chinese economics to be quite interesting especially how much regulation affected Macau and Hong Kong stocks. It’s been an amazing business-wise and will form case studies of many years to come.

37) Who did you miss?

– Recently, who else? But other than Trader who I still manage to see every two to three weeks, I miss Fi my girlfriend, my Fil-Chi friend Maryn in Taiwan, and my pianist/music teacher friend, among many other Taiwanese friends I’ve left behind. I also miss my mom.

38) Who was the best new person you met?

– Trader whom I’ve lost touch after university graduation. Funny how eight years later, we reconnect and we’re closer than ever before.

39) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned between October 2008 to October 2009:

– That sometimes, grandstanding isn’t the perfect way to get closer to your colleagues. Often times, putting your head down and being more of a team player works in a large organization where everyone is super competitive and is just out to get you. Sure, your boss takes a lot more time to recognize you but you get more done with soft words than being confrontational.

– Knowledge is in your hands. There are a gazillion of books available out there, but it’s really up to you to sit down and read them. If you want to get promoted, you’d have to prepare yourself for the next role and not just do your current job well.

– It’s better to be with someone who loves you more. I’ve heard a lot of women dictate that they’d rather be with someone who they love instead of someone who loves them more. I think that’s opening a Pandora’s Box of problems. Relationships are hard enough as it is, why make it even more complicated? A guy who loves you more put greater effort in keeping the relationship.

– You cannot change your parents. But you can choose who you surround yourself with. Choose wisely. If you can choose the right job, the right partner, the right friends, then you’re more or less on your way to success.

– Sometimes, the hardest thing to do is to say “no” to someone who you love. But if you really do love and respect yourself, you should still do it. It’s when you say no to someone who doesn’t treat you that well that you give yourself the chance to meet guys who do.

– The earlier you book your airline ticket, the cheaper it gets.

– Though it can be tough, pick your battles as well. There are some things that you must insist on.

40) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

Miss Independent – Ne-Yo

Ooh
It’s something about
Just something about
The way she moves
I can’t figure it out
There’s something
About her
There’s something
About kinda women
That want you
But don’t need you
Hey
I can’t figure it out
There’s something
About her

Cuz she walk like a boss
Talk like a boss
Manicured nails
To set
The pedicure off
She’s fly effortlessly

Cuz she move like a boss
Do what a boss
Dude
She got me thinking
About getting involved
That’s the kinda girl
I need

[chorus]

She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come
And spend a little time

She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Ooh
The way ya shine
Miss Independent

Yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeahhh

Ooh
There’s something
About kinda woman
That can do
It for herself
I look at her
And it makes me proud
There’s something
About her
There something
Ooh
So sexy
About the kinda women
That don’t even
Need my help
She says she got it
She got it
No doubt
There’s something
About her

Cuz she work
Like the boss
Play like the boss
Car and a crib
She about
To pay em both off
And her bills
Are paid on time
She made for a boss
Only a boss
Anything less
She’s tellin’ ’em
To get lost
That’s the girl
Thats on my mind

[chorus]

She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come
And spend
A little time
She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Ooh

The way ya shine
Miss Independent
Yeah, yeahhh
Her favorite thing
Is to say
Don’t worry I got it
And everything she got
Best believe
She bought it
She’s gonna steal my heart
Ain’t no doubt about it
Girl
You’re everything I need
Said you’re everything
I need

[chorus]

She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come
And spend a little time
She got her own thing
That’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Ooh the way ya shine
Miss Independent, Miss Independent
That’s why I love her

Have a great week ahead everyone!

About Bonita

I'm a forgetful person. But I think a lot. Every day, a lot of thoughts enter my head. That's why this blog came to be: first, to keep my memories alive through the years, and two, to actually see how I and my thoughts have changed. Please note that I seldom draft or edit my posts. Sometimes, if I'm not careful, I offend some of you, my readers. And while I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable, I am not sorry for being honest or for making well-intentioned mistakes. I will however be the first to admit if I change my mind. Hence, do read and proceed with caution. My life is as colorful and as boring as you make it. I complain many days, but offer some encouragement in others. Life is fluid, it changes. So keep the positives and throw away the negatives, and I do hope that at the end of the day, you will enjoy reading the blog and leaving comments here and there if my posts touches you. Happy reading!
This entry was posted in Boyfriend, Family, Favorite Posts, Hong Kong Life, Life lessons, Lists, Men, Movie reviews, Music, Personal opinion, Reflections, Relationships, Travels, Work. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Happy Birthday to a 29 year-old me!

  1. arthur chang says:

    wow…trader likes how i met your mother? try big bang theory. that is pretty funny too.

    w

  2. Dragonstalker says:

    Happy Birthday, Bonita! A bit belated, but still lots of good wishes for you 🙂

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