The Allure of the Girl-Next-Door

Who is the girl next door?

Do they really exist?

Personally, I think I’m one.

Despite being out almost every week, partying myself to death (or just having some quiet fun with friends), I know that deep in my heart, I am still that girl next door, who’s laidback enough to chill watching a funny video, dress in casual t-shirt and jeans without makeup when walking outside and loyal to her man when I decide which one I want.

How do we define her anyway? Is she some decent, pure and almost virginal feminine ideal?

Askmen.com defines the girl next door as follows:

She’s predictable and safe. What you see is what you get. You’ll always know where you stand with her, as well as where she stands on any given topic. There’s no guesswork involved and that makes her a welcome change from all the women who’ve played head games before.

She’s low maintenance. This is one of her best qualities. You won’t have to constantly buy her jewelry and other such gifts to keep her interested. She even enjoys just slumming-it for a night in or out with you. Jeans and a T-shirt are fashionable enough for a stroll around town. But here’s the kicker: when the occasion calls for it, she dresses to the nines.

She has family values. Because she comes from a solid family upbringing, she believes in the importance of family. If you ever want to be a dad, this is the woman you want as the mother of your children.

She has a good personality. Although this is not something you’d want to hear about someone you’re meeting on a blind date, the girl next door is easygoing and able to joke around with you about all kinds of topics. You can go anywhere with her and never get annoyed. She doesn’t complain, but she does speak her mind honestly and with respect for your feelings.

She’s trustworthy and reliable. You can take her word to the bank. If she tells you she is going to do something or be somewhere, it’s set in stone. You could give her your credit cards and never worry that she’ll overspend. Now that’s a headache you’ll be glad to avoid.

Oh yeah, I hate spending guy’s money. I feel obligated.

And if you agree to meet up with me, I’m there. It’s set in stone. Don’t even dare cancel in me cause that’s just rude… I always abide with the Golden Rule.

She’s nurturing and sweet. Unlike so many of the women you’ve dated who had militant stances against being nice to you simply because you were a man, she’s understanding of your needs and is willing to take care of you when you’re sick. Her sweet demeanor — and knowing that what goes around comes around — makes you want to be with her and take care of her in kind.

Yup, I can be sweet… though becoming less sweet in the previous months. Maybe it’s because I’ve realized being sweet means having people step all over you and taking advantage of you. So no more Mr. Nice Girl for me… or at least, when I can.

She doesn’t attract attention. She’s “under the radar,” so to speak. Guys won’t hit on her everywhere you go; not because she’s unattractive, but because she prefers to remain low-key, both in her appearance and her attitude. She’s neither a flirt nor is she flashy; but she has that natural beauty that doesn’t require coats of makeup.

Mike said he prefers me without makeup though I think it won’t hurt to enhance features whenever possible. I think I unconsciously flirt a bit though cause am just soooo affectionate. But nope, I stay loyal to my man so he can breathe easy knowing that at the end of the day, I’m still his… 🙂

She’s a homebody. She cooks, cleans and is not afraid of being at home, helping out with chores. Plus, she’s not a fan of clubbing. She thinks the nightclub scene consists of horny drunks and game players who don’t live honestly. And after all the not-so-great game players you’ve dated, this is a refreshing, alluring and potentially life-altering change for your dating scenario.

Haha, yes, I’m all that’s above the list save for one thing — I’m NOT really a homebody. I can’t really cook or clean, but I can help out with chores provided that it doesn’t have anything to do with laundry washing. In addition, I love clubbing. It’s a chance where I can dress sexy, have fun with pals and just dance to super-LOUD music! Though I won’t do it every single weekend, I’d love tohave the chance to go clubbing…

So what’s wrong with her?

You know the old adage, “If it’s too good to be true, it probably is”?

That can also apply to the girl next door.

Despite all the good qualities that I’ve ascribed to her, there are still some things to take into consideration — things that may displace her from the pedestal I’ve so readily put her on.

She’s not a challenge.

Let’s face it; after some time with her, you may become bored. If you usually enjoy the spice that comes with a certain amount of frustration in a relationship, then she will not be the one to scratch the confrontational itch.

Once you have her, the chase is over and you may eventually view her as a steadfast nuisance more than the sweet girl you thought you found.

She’s predictable and safe.

If you don’t like spontaneity, then this isn’t a problem. However, because she will never waver from the tried and true habits and experiences, you might have a problem spicing up your relationship just when you feel it’s most crucial to do so.

Can you say vanilla sex?

She might be playing you.

The worst possible thing to discover is that this was all an act. She really is that wild child party girl who sucked you in with the “nice girl” facade, and all of a sudden, you’re back playing the same relationship games that drove you to her in the first place.

She cooks, cleans and is not afraid of being at home, helping out with chores. Plus, she’s not a fan of clubbing.

She thinks the nightclub scene consists of horny drunks and game players who don’t live honestly.

And after all the not-so-great game players you’ve dated, this is a refreshing, alluring and potentially life-altering change for your dating scenario.

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About Bonita

I'm a forgetful person. But I think a lot. Every day, a lot of thoughts enter my head. That's why this blog came to be: first, to keep my memories alive through the years, and two, to actually see how I and my thoughts have changed. Please note that I seldom draft or edit my posts. Sometimes, if I'm not careful, I offend some of you, my readers. And while I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable, I am not sorry for being honest or for making well-intentioned mistakes. I will however be the first to admit if I change my mind. Hence, do read and proceed with caution. My life is as colorful and as boring as you make it. I complain many days, but offer some encouragement in others. Life is fluid, it changes. So keep the positives and throw away the negatives, and I do hope that at the end of the day, you will enjoy reading the blog and leaving comments here and there if my posts touches you. Happy reading!
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