I am mad…

* I wrote this last September 28, 2005 — one of the hardest days ever — and just posting it now because I’m too lazy and brain dead to write a new entry. Hopefully, it can shed some light on how I feel about being totally out of control of a situation at that time, and totally helpless in doing something about it. It takes me a while to get really mad, but when I do, I remember.

Have a great day.
========================================

I am mad…

I am mad because I am being judged…

I am mad because it is the people who do not know me, judge me…

I am mad because these judgments are based from stereotypes, instead of my own character and being…

I am mad because I am not being defended from these judgments…

I am mad because I am not given the chance to defend myself…

I am mad because these judgments are slowly changing the way you feel about me…

I am mad because these judgments bother you, tie your stomach to knots and stress you out…

I am mad because I cannot help you deal with this…

I am mad because you are willing to give up something beautiful because you are embarrassed…

I am mad because I know we have nothing to be ashamed of…

I am mad because ultimately, there’s really nothing I can do about it…

I am mad because you want me to settle for something else…

I am mad because I’d probably give it to you…

I do not get mad easily. But when things are unfair, I cannot help but be mad.

Hopefully though, you can realize that there are things beyond our control. But we can deal with them.

Together.

Please don’t give up. I think ours is something worth fighting for…

Be strong.

About Bonita

I'm a forgetful person. But I think a lot. Every day, a lot of thoughts enter my head. That's why this blog came to be: first, to keep my memories alive through the years, and two, to actually see how I and my thoughts have changed. Please note that I seldom draft or edit my posts. Sometimes, if I'm not careful, I offend some of you, my readers. And while I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable, I am not sorry for being honest or for making well-intentioned mistakes. I will however be the first to admit if I change my mind. Hence, do read and proceed with caution. My life is as colorful and as boring as you make it. I complain many days, but offer some encouragement in others. Life is fluid, it changes. So keep the positives and throw away the negatives, and I do hope that at the end of the day, you will enjoy reading the blog and leaving comments here and there if my posts touches you. Happy reading!
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to I am mad…

  1. chekwa says:

    raven’s crowing in full effect, ladies and gents!

    o sige, don’t be mad na. ok? 😀

  2. raven says:

    Haha, thanks for cheering me up Chekwa. This post has been made months ago, and I can never stay mad for long… 🙂

Leave a Reply