He asked me out, does he like me?

Every time a guy asks me out, I totally freak out.

Imagine my thought process: “OMIGOSH!!! He likes me!!! OMIGOSH!!! But I don’t like him that much!”

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!

This thought process seems to be normal here. In Taiwan or even the rest of Asia, if a guy asks you out (and this according to my Taiwanese girlfriends), he should like you. Asian guys are pretty shy; they usually won’t ask a woman out unless he really, really likes her. Otherwise, he’s too much of a sissy to ask you.

No wonder their heart often gets squashed to pieces…

Of course, it doesn’t help if I’m not even that attracted to a guy. Then, I’d have to be extra careful. I don’t want to lead anybody on.

That’s just me though: If I’m interested, I’ll show my interest. But if I’m not interested, there’s no way on earth that I would go out with you. A lot of Taiwanese women are happy in keeping their options open, dating around and finding the “best” one. I can’t. I can only be interested in one guy at a time, and if I’m not interested in you, sorry.

No wonder I’m still single. 🙁

But if you really think about it, how can a guy like you if he doesn’t even know you that well yet? And how can he know you that well if he doesn’t ask you out?

So again, I went to my guy-friends for some wisdom. This was when a guy who was a friend but I was not romantically interested in, asked me out. And again, they rolled their eyes in exasperation.

When a guy asks you out, he doesn’t like you. He is merely interested in you,” my trusty guy-friend said. “‘Interest’ and ‘like’ are two different things. Interest means that he’d like to get to know you better.”

Go! Go to that date. XXXXXX will show you a good time,” he encouraged. “He’ll wine you and dine you. At least, you’ll know what a good date feels like.”

My guy friend knew that my ex never treated me very well.

But it felt weird, because I was not even remotely interested in this guy. To tell you why, it was because he used to be interested in my close girlfriend here in Taiwan just a week before he met me. But my close girlfriend already had a significant other… so week went by, and he asked me out! I felt like I was having her sloppy seconds. It’s a pride thing.

Anyway…

Personally, I think a lot. If a guy shows his interest, my first automatic response is, “he likes me!” Because of that, I am more conscious when I’m with him. I am unconsciously more careful on what I say or do when I’m in his company.

But one thing I should remember, it’s not “like” at all. No guy can ever like someone in that very short period of time. They are interested, period. But they don’t want to marry you just yet.

So this is what I should remember. Next time a guy asks me out, to just take it easy. Go and have fun!

Ciao!

About Bonita

I'm a forgetful person. But I think a lot. Every day, a lot of thoughts enter my head. That's why this blog came to be: first, to keep my memories alive through the years, and two, to actually see how I and my thoughts have changed. Please note that I seldom draft or edit my posts. Sometimes, if I'm not careful, I offend some of you, my readers. And while I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable, I am not sorry for being honest or for making well-intentioned mistakes. I will however be the first to admit if I change my mind. Hence, do read and proceed with caution. My life is as colorful and as boring as you make it. I complain many days, but offer some encouragement in others. Life is fluid, it changes. So keep the positives and throw away the negatives, and I do hope that at the end of the day, you will enjoy reading the blog and leaving comments here and there if my posts touches you. Happy reading!
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4 Responses to He asked me out, does he like me?

  1. Ronald Allan says:

    So! Would you go out with me? 🙂

    Seriously though…I think you hit the nail on the head…and probably why I’m still single too…but that’s a long story…:-)

  2. abe says:

    if he finds you interesting, don’t lay all your cards in the open. 🙂 Just chill out a bit and play it cool..

  3. eventuallypretty says:

    its the thing we females like to do in our past times. analyze guys. 🙂

    hope you enjoy your date 😉

  4. raven says:

    Abe, he already knows am interested in him. 🙁 We talked, and we both admitted we are interested with each othre. Is it too late now to chill out and play a bit cool?

    Haha, Ronald Allan! Thanks for making me smile. 🙂

    EventuallyPretty, haven’t been out on a date with him — yet. But been hanging out with him Friday, Saturday and Sunday… but that’s with a lot of friends.

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